Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
