I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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