I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
