So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
