whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
