Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I smell like Dick and happiness
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
