You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
