On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
