so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Why did my mother make you get naked?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
