If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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