About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Semen is not good for contacts.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize