I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
