By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Randomize
