so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
