I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
