Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
We need to rekindle our bromance
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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