Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
