4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
