Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
