fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
