I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
