Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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