your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
