he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize
