she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
