I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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