My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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