I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
