You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
