12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
