just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
She bit a glass in half.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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