did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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