She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
