I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize