i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
