chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
