but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
