Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Walk of Shame today included voting.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
