What did we do last night that was yellow?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
high people should be assigned attendants
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize