I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
