Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
