Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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