i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
My balls are so social today.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
