The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize