Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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