If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Buhtt sex?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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