Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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