I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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