how can u be prego again
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
