What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize
