I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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